Motel Mysteries: Motormouth Mike and the Alien Invasion
Hey hey hey. Are you listening to me? Nobody ever listens to me but you ought to because I’ve seen things, things that you wouldn’t believe and nobody ever believes me either but you ought to because i’ve seen things that you better believe if you know what’s good for you because they’re coming and you better believe it because I’ve seen them with my own two eyes and you should listen to me about that because you really really really don’t want to be taken by surprise with these guys. Really not with these guys because they’re DANGEROUS. I know they’re dangerous because I’ve seen them myself and they are not a good time let me tell you. Do you understand English? Are you listening to me? I can tell you’re not really listening just staring at me like you think that will fool me but you ought to be listening to me because this is VERY IMPORTANT and not just to me either. This will give you something to cry about let me tell you. I’m trying to warn you that the aliens have landed yes they have! It’s true right over there in that field last night I saw them and I saw their ship all round and shimmery like the moon had dropped out of the sky and then and then and then then they came OUT yes out of that moon and I’m not making this up I saw it and I heard them too they are very mean sounding and they are here to take over and I don’t know why you don’t listen to me how many times do i have to tell you anyway? You just sit there like always staring at nothing staring at me like I’m crazy or in your way or something and you all don’t even talk to each other do you? Just sit there staring at each other and the parking lot like it was some kind of picnic spot but THIS IS NO PICNIC and you need to pay attention to what I’m saying and stop just pretending to listen. You think that’s polite, but you should do some soul searching because because I can still tell you’re not really listening to me just like always acting like I’m in your way keeping you from enjoying the thrills of this parking lot and the bug lights. Bug lights. As if they even do any good at keeping the bugs away bet you wish they would keep me away because then you wouldn’t have to pretend to listen would you but you’ll wish you had listened pretty soon when THEY come here because the bug lights sure won’t keep them away you just wait and see they won’t keep them away from you and you’ll wish it was still me talking to you and you’ll be sad that you didn’t listen to me then you bet you will you’ll be crying but I won’t be here to hear you say sorry or to hear you complaining about what’s going on because I’ll be LONG GONE because I saw them and I know they are coming and so i’m getting out of here while the getting is good and you would too if you were smart but you’re not are you just sitting here doing nothing while other people work and other people do things for you and you don’t even care, you’re not even paying attention when other people are trying to save your life even though you don’t deserve it at all but I keep trying to tell you because that’s the kind of guy I am even if you don’t appreciate it. Well never mind then I won’t bother you any more I’m going inside and you can all just sit here in the sun with the bugs and the cars and the bug lights and WAIT AND SEE what happens next. So there. Y’all have a good day now I’m going in. I hear my mother calling me.